Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
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