Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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