I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
so much tequila, so little girl.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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