literally had 100 drinks last night.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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