why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
