I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
it was like eating out sand paper
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
