Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
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