i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
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