I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Randomize
