i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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