so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Did I show you my penis last night?
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
