I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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