I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
