Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
Randomize
