We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
you didnt know i had herpes?
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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