why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
