everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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