Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
