It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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