quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
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