East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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