He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
