you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Randomize
