Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Randomize
