I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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