8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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