Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
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