no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
