David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
