so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Boobs are out for the taking
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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