Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Randomize
