So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
