soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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