i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
