No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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