Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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