I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I have already put on my inside pants.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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