just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
