Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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