maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
time to smoke my breakfast
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
His nipple licking is glorious
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