with your own penis?
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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