hotel room ftw
Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
