He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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