It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
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