Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
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