Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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