Whod you bang
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
