I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
