im about as happy as oj after his trial
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Randomize
