I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I want to walk on stilts...naked
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Randomize
