ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize
